Birthday!

I just turned 39. (Legit 39, not In-Denial 39!) And with my birthday falling on a Tuesday, I kind of downplayed it a little bit.  I downplay a lot about myself, and I’m probably too humble in general, but I don’t like to call attention to myself. But as much as I downplayed my birthday, in reality, I feel that birthdays are important for several reasons.  

First and most importantly, a birthday should be a celebration that is all about you. A birthday is a chance to celebrate yourself, and a chance for others to celebrate you as well. It could be as simple as a celebration of surviving yet another year, or (to me, more importantly) a more in-depth celebration of who you are, what you represent, the positives you bring to this world and to those around you. And we all have those things that deserve to be celebrated.

Secondly, a birthday is a natural checkpoint, or milestone, to be able to reflect on where you’ve come from and where you may be headed. A birthday can be a major interchange where all directions are open and any direction could be the right one. And in reality, any day could be a checkpoint, or the definition of a birthday, the marking of another year, tends to make this event a consistent place to review. Even some of the wishes that are typically given on a birthday fall into this category:  “here’s to the start of a great year of success for you!” A birthday, in that respect, is like your own personal Happy New Year celebration.

And I feel that reflection and review are important. The old adage of “you can’t know where you’re going if you don’t know where you’ve been” is one I particularly believe in.  As we all go through life, day in and day out, things happen and plans change and roadblocks pop up and detours are made. Without taking the time to stop and review steps, and determining where you are, and where you want to end up, it’s easy to get lost and start to panic and end up roaming in circles, seemingly more and more out of control. Sometimes a checkpoint is needed to be able to stop, rest, reset, and restart.  

The one downside, or caution, of using a birthday as a checkpoint, is when you use your age as a comparison point to measure against others at the same age. I’m one year from a major milestone, 40, and that milestone usually has many people start to say things like, “I expected to be here at 40,” or, “most people are at this point at 50.” Everyone has a unique set of events, circumstances, and paths which led them to where they are at their milestones, and that should have absolutely no bearing on where you are, or should be, at that same milestone.  Depending on who or what I pay attention to, I am in a similar place to many 39-year-olds, but if I change my point-of-view, I may be behind or even in front of other 39-year-olds. And even using the terms “behind” and “in front” implies a judgmental ranking on where other people are in comparison to some abstract standard.  

So, for the record, am I where I want to be at 39? Not necessarily. But I know how I got here, and I am at peace with it – no regrets. Where I am at 39 is not a bad place to be at all. I know what I have to do to get to where I want to be. For me, it is about the journey, the travels, the road trip, and I am enjoying this ride. I’m about riding this ride ‘til the wheels fall off!

Besides, 40 is just a number between 39 and 41.  :)